January 29, 2010
Taking Down the Tree
Posted in Health, Life, Personal tagged Cancer, Christmas dcorations, undecorating at 3:47 pm by pdxfirefly
Yes, Portland Firefly knows that it is almost February; but today I finally had the energy to remove the decorations from my ‘everlasting’ tree. I love Christmas and I love the way my home looks when it is decorated for the holidays. I even have special Christmas dishes that I use during this season. But today was the day that I finally decided that the tree had to come down.
As I took a slight break and gazed at the partially undecorated tree, I had a thought. I wondered if this was the last time that I would be undecorating a tree. Last Christmas I wasn’t even sick yet and now I am left wondering if I will be decorating my home in 2010 for Christmas. All signs lead to the fact that I’ll be here doing all the things that I love, but those Stage IIIc statistics (31% survive 5 years) are always there.
Especially on the days when I am more tired than usual or when I am too critical of my appearance. Particularly my eyes; they seem to be more sunken and tired-looking than I would like them to be. I hope my doctor doesn’t read this because she would be ‘not happy’ with me to hear me talking like this. However, I want to be honest. I want to be honest with you my readers and more important I have to be honest with myself. And these are the thoughts that I am having today.
Was this my last Christmas to decorate for Christmas? Will I feel like it next Christmas? Will I have the energy to decorate? Only God knows the answer.
Michele LaDuke Ball said,
January 30, 2010 at 7:19 am
Dear Firefly,
It is natural to have the thoughts of not being able to do the wonderful activities at Christmas time that you have always enjoyed. But please heed this advice; do not bring clouds on today’s sunshine.
What would happen if your Christmas tree stayed up ALL year? Nothing, zippo, nada except you would have year long Christmas enjoyment. I love the lights on the tree at night. It is personal artwork. Now is the time to be the eccentric person that is in all of us.
Thank you for sharing your feelings. I think of you often with a prayer on my lips..just for you.
Michele
Donna said,
January 30, 2010 at 6:14 pm
I posted a comment before, but I’m not sure it took. I was diagnosed with primary peritoneal cancer, stage 111C, in 1999. Here I am with no evidence of disease after almost 11 years. You are right — no one knows — but I hope you will have faith that good things can happen. You may still have a long and wonderful life. Keep hoping.
ELEANOR BOYD said,
February 1, 2010 at 5:39 am
I pray that your faith and hope might be in God. I Peter 1:21
Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye
ELEANOR BOYD said,
February 1, 2010 at 5:53 am
may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost. Rom. 15:13
Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer.
Rom. 12: 12
Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence
of reward. Heb. 10:35
And if the Spirit of Him Who raised up Jesus from the dead dwells in you,
then He Who raised up Christ Jesus from the dead will also restore to life
your mortal body through His Spirit Who dwells in you. Rom. 8:11
Pam, I am still praying that you shall not die, but live, and declare the
works of the Lord. Ps. 118:17
Finally, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Phillipians 4:8
Love you, Eleanor
Charles Mosley said,
February 1, 2010 at 9:37 am
Try not to worry. Think about good things and good memories. The Lord will call for you when it is time. Just live your life and be happy until that day. I have been praying for a boy who had cancer all over his body. His own parents thought that he was in his last days about six months ago. I went to there home over the weekend. The boy looks great. He is a little undersized for a 14 yearold boy, but he has been dealing with cancer for years. But he was eating well. He was very happy. And right now the doctors cannot find a trace of cancer in his body. I believe in prayer. I believe int he power of the Lord Jesus Christ to heal. I know it is tough to remember these things when you are going through the difficulty. I look forward to reading this blog 10 years from now.
Michele LaDuke Ball said,
February 1, 2010 at 1:03 pm
Amen, Charles.
mj said,
March 24, 2010 at 9:07 pm
Soooo fun catching up on your cumin’s and goin’s… There’s timing in the dreaming of God. A dream from God cannot be killed.
I loved reading the comments from your readers. It seems to me that you really are staying in the house of dream encouragers! =D